I've barely been able to think since it all happened and I don't even want to write about it but I have to. I hurt my mom, really badly. I feel so awful and I don't know if she's going to be okay or not.
She and Sparky's mom came to the barn together. I was so happy to see her. I'd just gotten my dinner alfalfa but she put my halter and chain lead on so I knew we were going for a walk. I was excited. I love going for walks. We went over to the tack boxes where Sparky was and his mom untied him so I knew we were going to walk together and that made it even nicer.
We started down the road. It was just a regular walk. I was sniffing poop, sniffing mud, looking around. It was fun. I started dancing a little bit and my mom calmed me down and led me on. Everything was okay.
Then we got to the place where people park their cars. I could tell we were headed for the Pony Arena and I was so excited! I thought I might get turned out and be able to run and I couldn't wait. I started dancing and twirling and Mom talked to me and tried to keep me calm but I kept getting sillier and sillier. I couldn't help it. It's been so long! But there's no excuse for what happened next.
Sparky was already down in the grass near the Pony Arena. Mom tried to lead me there but I kept twirling and backing up. Then I reared. I reared up really high and all of a sudden I lost my balance! I don't know how - I was kind of on a hill and I started falling over backwards. It was scary! Mom tried to help me with the lead - she was pulling a little bit to try to balance me but I kept on going and finally crashed down to the ground.
And as I went, I pulled her forward. She tripped on one of my hind legs and fell and my front foot which was waving around trying to get some balance smacked her right in the face!
Oh, it was awful! She was curled up on the ground and there was blood everywhere! I was so scared! I jumped to my feet and ran but I didn't know where I was running to. Sparky's mom ran to my mom and I could hear her saying, "Oh god mom, get to the office now!" and my mom saying, "I have to catch Bella. Poor Bella!" Even though I hurt her, she was worried about me.
Sparky's mom just yelled at her. "GET TO THE OFFICE NOW!" and then another lady ran down the hill and helped my mom walk away. I was still rushing around but Sparky had stopped running as soon as he heard his mom whistle so I got closer to him and his mom caught me. I was happy to be caught! I was so scared and worried. Spark's mom led me back to my stall and I tried to be really good. A nice man came with us in case she needed help but I wasn't going to be bad anymore.
And now I don't know anything. Sparky's mom came out to take care of me yesterday and I tried to be really good for her. She told me that my mom would be okay but that she's pretty badly hurt. I guess she has some broken bones in her face.
What if she hates me? I would hate me if I were her. I'm just a Bad Pony is what I am. I don't deserve to have such a good mom. What kind of horse hurts her mom like that? I couldn't blame her if she sold me or sent me away. But I hope she doesn't.
I've really screwed up this time. :(
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